waiting...

you should be sitting there, in that chair,
watching me, guessing where i am…

i have no audience, nothing to call me away,
and I want you to try again to save
me from my mind…
the game i invented for you, darling;
i only play it with you because i need it
and you want it…

little do you suspect how far into you
i have gone…
beyond your eyes, beyond the words on
your lips…
far, far into you…
now life is boring without you
and your promise,
and, i miss you…

but the game looms dangerous,
in the distance, tomorrow…
about to consume us, i fear…
there is nothing else i have to offer you
to make you wait for me…

and if the charade becomes
my reality, you will soon weary of
darkness and dreary doubt…
of my inability to get beyond me,
back into you
where the real joy of us lies…


waiting...soliloquies
ja allen